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Same dishes, different day [Mar. 3rd, 2013|02:22 am]
[Current Location |United States, Michigan, Royal Oak]
[mood |curiouscurious]
[music |In This Moment; Whore]

I figured after rediscovering my live journal yet again, I'd start keeping a daily journal or at least something close to it. Most the people I know on here, if not all, stopped posting on here long ago so this would mostly be for myself.
Today was the same as many others, I went to work with hardly any sleep as I often do on weekends (Friday through Sunday). Had a busy day at work with little to nothing being interesting or eventful. I came home and Ruby watched the TMNT movie, though I don't think she payed it much attention. I was surprised, she loved the first two, but she was distracted by her drawing book which I totally understand. Even to this day when I'm in the mood to draw, nothing can tear me away from it! lol
The wife and I had a nice relaxing evening, I listened to music well Kim read. We even had us some saucy alone time but got spooked thinking Kevin would come home and catch us going at it in the den so we moved to less public areas. lol I followed that by cooking garlic herb shrimp! It was most tasty! Then Kim went to bed and Kevin and I got to chatting as he'd come home around the time I made the shrimp.

Yesterday and today Kim and I were talking about whats going to happen with Kevin. He and I have lived together for about 3-4 years now and he's my best friend, my brother even but Kim and I both wonder if he's even going to move out. Kim and I talk about wanting a dog and I told her I want to wait till Kevin moves out and the first thing she said to me is "I don't think he's ever going to move out." and now I wonder that myself. I love him and I like living with him, but he's single, 30, working at home depot with no aspect on his future, he plans on going back to school for science, but thats no plan on moving out, it's almost as though he's going back to school just for giggles, no real plan.
Now I'm not doing much better myself really, but Kim and I together can afford our house, car and properly take care of Ruby. Kevin can't do any of these things on his own right now. I honestly with there was something I could do for him to help him, not that I want him to leave, I guess I just wish he were able to take care of himself right now. If we lost this house for some reason, he'd be forced to go back to his parents place and I wonder if he'd live long after that. He may not admit it, but he's very prideful and that would honestly kill him.

As I said above, even with being able to afford this place on my own I still loath what I do. I mostly do dishes at my job, now it's easy and I love the fact that I get to talk to my rather interesting co-workers and listen to my own music all day, my hair can be as long as I want, as well as my beard and I get to wear what I want without problem. But is all this worth a shitty $9 an hour? I keep talking about wanting to go back to school for Law Enforcement. I LOVE weapons, I shoot archery twice a week, I've done knife throwing, axe throwing and even practice kendo (asian sword fighting) and some kick boxing. I am infatuated with the idea of the ancient warrior and want to be the modern equivalent. But I do truly fear how good of an officer I'd be. I fear being a coward. I want to face criminals, but at the same time fear harm to myself. But I think with proper training I'd do well. I've been told countless times that people think I'd do well as an officer, I'm honest and honorable, wise far beyond my years.

So maybe with this journal, I can start keeping up with the other things I've been meaning to do on a regular basis, such as working out and getting my college set up. So tomorrow, lets see if I remember to go work out. Hell, we have free weights, a weight bench and a boxing bag in the basement! I've also been talking about teaching Ruby what I know too, she should know how to defend herself but with discipline of course!

Well, I need to be asleep in the next 10 minutes if I want to get at least 6 hours of sleep, as normal per the weekend!

Night all!


PS: I'd like to add that I've recently (the past year or so) gotten into Norse mythology and they had a set of 9 guidelines, "The nine noble virtues" These were "courage, discipline, fidelity, honor, hospitality, industriousness, perseverance, self reliance and truth. They were more like commandments, but as I'm not religious, I find them to be guidlines and I think it'd be wise to follow them. The main two that I'm trying very hard to keep as close to as possible are Industriousness and Truth, these two I often lack in and need to work hard on. The rest I tend to do rather well in and shall keep to it!
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5 years! [Feb. 24th, 2013|03:41 am]
[Current Location |United States, Michigan, Royal Oak]
[mood |nostalgicnostalgic]
[music |Billie Holiday]

Last time I posted in this was after Katy and I broke up in 07' and I started hanging out with Kevin again! Lets see, later that year I got my GED and started college, was working a land scaping job with a crazy hippie named Ron. But that job was only seasonal, so eventually I was laid off and I failed my two classes at school, I dropped one and failed the other, but paid my parents for it. They then said I needed a job by new years or they were going to kick me out. Well, I'd found a job but it didn't start till Jan.7th of 09', they said that wasn't good enough and I needed to move out. My brother was kind enough to take me in, I lived with him for about 3 months till his psycho girl friend cheated on him and moved out, I had no job, my phone had died, we had no internet and I knew no one in the area, leaving me along for about 20 hours of the day. I dropped into a horrible depression, I tried to contact my parents to see if they'd be willing to bring me my old phone since the one I'd had was dying. I used the last tiny bit of change to call them and they blew me off. When they finally did get a hold of me they seemed annoyed that I'd even call them, but I did finally get that phone which helped a lot! I couldn't take the isolation much longer.
So about April of 09' I moved in with my friends Jessy and Leigh, which wasn't to bad at first, but Jessy treated me like his bitch, yelling and scream over nothing! I also didn't have a full room. I had a corner of the basement and his kids play room was just outside of my room, which at noon he'd allow them to start playing even if I wasn't up yet. Now during this time, I'd been dating a girl named Andrea about the time I started college. She was good to me in that year, but she was lazy and refused to do anything with her life and still to this day doesn't do anything. I ended up meeting a girl named Brianna, she was young (18 and I was 25) and had a car, a job and was going to college. So I asked myself "why wasn't I with someone like that?" and ended up breaking up with Andrea. Brianna ended up being flaky as you'd expect out of an 18 year old. So I moved on, I spent the next six months or so going through one night stands and crazy psycho girlfriends. I met a girl named Allison, she was fine at first but turned out to be raciest, which I'm not cool with and her best friend was the only other person she'd ever slept with and he was going crazy wanting her and it ended up she lied to me about going someone with him when she said she wasn't. So after breaking up with her I started seeing Brianna again and Allison started dating her best friend that we'd had problems with and they started telling lies about us that broke Brianna up. She even said I gave Allison an STD, how nice. When I went to go get myself checked out, the nurse said to talk to her and make sure she was lying, because if she wasn't to find out what it was because there are things they can't check for. Well I turned up clean and Allison claimed she never said the STD thing which is bullshit.
So after Brianna and I broke up I met a girl named Vera. Now, I love mythology and at the time greek mythology was my obsession and she was Macedonian (country just north of greece) and I thought I'd found my soul mate. I'd told her I'd take it slow and respect her and the first night we hung out, she almost couldn't keep her hands off of me and the next day she was naked with in 5 minutes! lol The creeper part, she'd told me she doesn't sleep with anyone she isn't dating and after we slept together the first thing she said to me was "Well, I guess we're dating now". Yeah, this should have been a warning to me. Her ex husband ended up looking me up on facebook, she was freaked and broke up with me, we'd fight, have make up sex and we'd date for two weeks till it happened again and again. Finally, just before new years of 09', I told her I couldn't do it again and we stayed broken up.
About that time I'd meet another girl on the same site I'd met many of the girls I'd hooked up with on, a site called Detroit Gothic.net. I met a woman named Kim. At the time I thought she was just cute, so I messaged her and after a week or so she finally messaged me back. We talked on the phone and really connected. At this point I was not interested in a relationship after all the crazy relationships I'd had over the past year. So we met in person for the first time at Necto, a goth club in Ann Arbor. I was truly intimidated by her sexually, she was as tall as me but in 6 inch heels! She had been a dancer for years and when I saw her dance for the first time I was left in awe! After the club we went to my friend Veronicas ex/gf's house, where we snugged and made out, it was rather romantic and sexy since we had gotten to watch a naked lesbian run through the house!
After that adventure I'd went to New York with my Dad for a few days, it was outstanding! I really had made something new of myself and liked my life, other then still living with Jessy and Leigh. Now Kevins life wasn't going so well at this time, when we'd started hanging out again in 07'-08', He'd broken up with his girl friend Jessica for his ex, Sherry. Sherry was tall, smart and beautiful, but lets not forget, addicted to heroin. I didn't know this at the time. One day they were almost 2 hours late to a dinner I'd made for them because they were out getting high and when I looked at Kevins eyes I could tell he was high, when I asked him about it he claimed he wasn't high and I believed him. I warned him that if I caught him doing that shit I'd hit him. A few months later, Sherry died. Kevin told me he was doing it and almost died of it himself. He went into a deep depression and about the time I'd met Allison, her best friend showed interest in him, I suggested he should sleep with her just to make himself feel better, even though this woman was mega psycho and totally unfuckable by any standard. Then she ended up shacking up with a girl named April (she comes into play later). So well I was in New York, Kevin calls me and I answer, rather annoyed saying "Dude, what? I'm in New York with my Dad right now" Kevin "Lila (The psycho bitch), said she's pregnant...!" *Pause* ...... Me: "OOOH!!!" at this point even my Dad wanted to know what was going on! lol Ends up she was lying, Kevin said April was his new girlfriend and that they should all meet, Lila never showed up and later said she had a miscarriage and when Kevin asked for medical evidence she freaked out on him.
After this things became pretty smooth sailing. Kevin, April and I all moved in together, April found a boyfriend and Kevin started dating his ex Jessica again, Kim and I started dating and all went well for about a year. The only issue we had was Aprils 10 year old son who would eat our food and get into our stuff. After that first year things got better and the boy got better. Then Halloween of 10' I asked Kim to marry me. Someone had asked me at one point if Kim and I were engaged and I hadn't even thought of it at the time and it got me thinking, I could see myself marrying her, unlike all my other ex's. I was so nervous I couldn't even get down on one knee. I'd bought her an old bronze ring with a ruby in it, but it was to large, she had to wear it on her index finger! lol Then as time went on April got worse, blaming Kevin and I for everything, she eventually moved her boyfriend in which we got along with him well but she just continued to get worse despite this.
My parents had just moved out of their house in Ferndale and to Royal Oak and their old house was just sitting empty due to the bank and my parents offered the house to us for a year, no rent. So we took the offer and hadn't spoken to April since.
After that life had been pretty smooth sailing! we spent about 14 months at the Ferndale house and they were amazing months. Kim and I were married in that house, we had a celtic hand fasting. My step daughter (4 at the time, now almost 6) Ruby moved in with us there. She the shinning light of my life, shes so much like me now it's almost scary.
Once our time was up at the Ferndale house I found out a family member wanted to rent out their parents old house, their parents are in their 90's and are in a home and they need to pay for the house, so we now have a 4 bed room house in Royal and we only pay utilities and property tax. We moved about 2 months ago and we just love it! Ruby's new school is amazing and the area is just great, we have a massive park behind our house where Ruby can play and a large garden and patio in the back, along with a car and a half garage.
That being said, I've never been so happy. It's not just the house or that we now have a car, it's the family, the life, the friends. I have an amazing life and I went through hell to get it. At one point I was even homeless and now I have a beautiful home and family. I show off my life to people with great pride! Not because I was someone to be jealous, but because I built this. I worked hard and this is what I now have because it.

Also, a good note is what happened to Katy. About the time Kevin and I moved in with April, we were hanging out with Katy and at this point Katy and I would sleep together from time to time whenever we were both single. I met Kim and was in a stable relationship and Kim had known mine and Katy's past, but trusted us as friends. During this time Katy started dating some douchebag named Brian, he looks like a skinny version of Murder Face from Dethklok! lol So he ends up knocking her up, he meets Kim and we'd gotten engaged and he tells Katy that he doesn't want her around me because I just want to steal her from him! She pregnant and I have a wife to be. Shes still with this crazy, controlling baby dad asshole. After Kim and I got married, Katy gave me a call to congratulate me and I told her I didn't want to talk to her unless Brian knew about it, I wouldn't have a hidden friendship with her. She said okay, she'd talk to him and get back to me. That was a year and a half ago. I've spoken to all her sisters and brothers since then, none of them can stand Brian. I know that he doesn't work, Katy works full time taking care of him and his other kids as well as their son. So thats what happened to Katy, she got a family but she had gotten a controlling asshole with it. Oh well. I can't force her to live smart.

That being said, I'm happy and I'd do it all over again knowing where I am now. I'm only 28 and still have a whole life to live.
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Long time no entry. lol [Jan. 8th, 2008|08:05 am]

Wow, I haven't posted in this thing in like 2 years!!! Well, lets see, Katy and I lasted till Oct. 6th I believe was the date we'd split up. So we lasted a total of 3 years, they were good, but the last year we were together kinda went shitty. I was working at 7-11, which I enjoyed, I endded up moving into her families new house, which did not make me happy, we shared the basement with her sister... 
So no privicy at all, we didn't have a car and at the time she wasn't working. So in aug. I lost my job at 7-11 which really, really sucked, I slipped into a depression and went back to my parants house. Since I was spending most of my time there, the pissed off both my parants and Katy, Katy wanted me home and my parants wanted me out of the house. But one day, Katy calls me up saying if I don't return in the next few days, we'd need to talk about where our relationship was going. So I called her back and said maybe we should talk about it, maybe we should break up. So, later on, she called me and said maybe thats a good idea, but she just wanted to take a break, I on the other hand wanted to be single. I didn't think I loved Katy anymore, she was jobless and clingly. So, during that time I was didn't do much, Katy and I were still hanging out and sleeping together, but broken up, but she'd gotten job at Subway (Which is where she is still at). 
Then, on Nov. 13 I was going to ask her back out, I went and picked her up from her work, I was early but didn't know it. I felt like a kid in a candy store when I saw her, I'd totally fallen back in love with her, after we'd broken up I'd stopped bitching at her about smoking and drinking and she stopped being so fucking clingy. So, I pick her up and she tells me she doesn't want to sleep together anymore, because she feels guilty even going on dates. (We'd said that if we'd started sleeping with someone else, we'd tell the other person and break things off, this comes into effect later) So I tell her I was going to ask her back out right then and there. So she tells me she isn't interested anymore and that shes "dating" this new guy, Jason (I type his name with a sick feeling in my stomach). Two weeks later, I go to her house after having about 6 cups of coffie and I'm all tweeked out, she tells me shes sleeping with him, that the day before I came to pick her up and was going to ask her back out she'd fucked him. I, felt, destroyed. Later that evening I, feeling that I'd have nothing left to lose broke into her myspace and read things I really wish I hadn't. 
So, after reading that, I went into a semi-suicidal depression. I wasn't happy to say the least, then it endded up she started dating him and is now in love with him. Now, the reason I don't like him is, he's a Medic, a diabedic and a drunk... He got cought drunk driving the other day and he should fucking know better. He blows up Katy all the fucking time. He's also rather crazy, which I don't get into detail about.
But Katy and I are still friends, to a limit. I'm just tired of hearing about this guy from her, she calls me just basically talking about just him, she knows I'm still in love with her, why the fucked would she talk about that shit?!  I dunno.

Lets see, Vanessa and I started talking, again! haha, The first time we talked about 2-3 months ago, she was as normal, really distant and quiet. But now when we talk she's open, happy and giggly! We talk for like 4-5 hours at a time and shit. It's awesome, hopefully we'll be able to hang out soon, I haven't seen her in atleast a year, atleast! I've also started talking to my friend Megan from High School, an awesome, beautiful girl! I feel she could be my best friend if she wasn't so distant, it's hard to get ahold of her to hang out. I actually liked her when we started hanging out again, she's very much like myself, it's a pitty shes gay! haha!
Then I started hanging out with my friend Kevin again, he's been like a brother to me since like high school, so about 3 weeks ago we went to City for his birthday, we've gone every week since! it's been a blast!
I met a friend of his, this girl named Bronze, shes also fucking awesome! I promised her and Megan I'd dance with them at City not long ago and I did, took a few drinks to get me to, but I did! haha Then I went to Bronze's new years party, that was a blast, only I got really drunk and drunk called Katy, I said she made me sick to my stomach and I think shes a fucking whore. haha! 
So, I likely won't be drinking again anytime soon, I can't remember much from 2am-3:30am Jan. 1st 2008. lol 

Now, last night Katy called me just going on and on about Jason... Then asked if I wanted to her a story about him being a dumb ass, I snapped at her no, why would she think I'd want to hear anything about him?! So she got pissed and got off the phone with me... So last night I had this bad dream where we hung out and Jason as actting like a dick to her so we slept together, but I stopped because I said to her "after this, your just going to go back to him aren't you?" And she replyed "Yes" so I stopped everything and felt like the world was cloaked in a shadow around me and it was just me, no one else, alone. So when I woke up I thought about this old Journal, so I looked it up and found my old entries, which was about Darcy and when Katy and I first started dating and now I'm the G-man in it all. 
But after reading all those old entries, it reminded me of who I was and am. :) For the first time in ages I feel like myself! Confedent and cheerful. Welling to take on the world and give them one hell of a fight.

Also, I've started studying for my GED, I take the test in about 3 weeks, I start collage in about 3-4 months, I have a job interview today, looks like I most likely have that job, it's a coffie house which is awesome for me, it's also right up woodward, so if I can't use a car, I can take the bus.

So remember, hold onto those you love, because you won't know how much you love them until there gone.

-Edward the Honorable

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(no subject) [Nov. 2nd, 2005|07:31 pm]
Dear DIE-ary,

Well, I just might have found a job! WOO HOO! My mother was kind enough to wake me up today to tell me Meijer called since I filled in an app there a week ago saying they need midnight stock people! They also said they need me to come in tonight at midnight and talk to the shift manager. I'm so happy! Now, we've just got to get Katy a job and all will be back on track.
Lets see, I got to talk to Vanessa two nights ago, she seems to be doin' well, though her health as normal seems to be goin' down... That poor girl can't win for losin'! But she sounds rather happy with her new man whom sounds very nice. :-) I can't wait to meet him! I didn't even offer to kill him or anything! Umm, oh! That was also Halloween, lol, when the kids started comin' around I was standing out front with my parants, I own a Guillie suit (thats the suit snipers wear, it looks like grass but it's made out of berlap) which I wore, long with a cama bandana and my guillied Airsoft sniper rifle! I was standing with the bushes so they couldn't see me, as the kids walked by I'd move my rifle and shoulder it, it would scare the shit out of them! One girl pointed and asked if I was real, I said yeah and moved my arm, she turned around screaming and almost ran into our very large tree in our yard! I wish we wouldn't have ran out of candy, I was havin' so much fun! Well, thats my good news for now, I'll start writting in this more, feels good to get things out like this. :-)

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(no subject) [Oct. 25th, 2005|02:30 am]
There are times in your life when you just need to lash out, pitty I have to much self control for that... Well, lets see here... Last I left off Katy and I were just starting to date, since then we've moved in together and at first were going to get an apartment but my mother got laid off so my parants offed there basement for a really cheap price since they needed the money, good deal. Katy and I have been wonderful since, we've had our 1 year a few weeks back and all is well...

But about 6 weeks ago Katy quit her job at Coney Island because of the bitch's that worked there... The only problem being is she has yet to find a job. I told her a few days ago that shes got two weeks to find a job otherwise she'll have to move back to her mothers because I can't support her... So what happends? My uncle/manager at that same Coney Island where I work fires me... Can't blame him, I was a good worker but a pain in the ass, but he could have picked a better time... So now, here I am, jobless and scared.

What made me write this is my need to let it out but more of my want for my friend Vanessa, in the past year or so most know that her and I had a falling out, at first do to both of us but then in the long run it was my fault from lack of trying. We'ed have a date and I'd cancel, no wonder we stopped talking. I've read shes moved in with her new boyfriend that most have said he's rather nice, I'm happy to hear that, I also heard shes back in school, that also being very good news. I too wanted to go back to school but I can't afford it now with out a job. It's just depressing to me that someone I once loved and knew so well is now so far away. This happend to me before with my old friend David Burns whom I went to Jr high and High school with.

Most people say change is good, and I've often found this to be very true, but I'm now finding change to also be harder then I can stand at times. I can remember when Sara was cute and ALMOST pure, now shes in Florida and often change make up her mind if she likes it here or there and he's into drugs a drinking... At first I wasn't happy with Vanessa's change but in the long run it seemed to be for the best, shes doing rather well now! :-) I don't know whats up with David though, I should find out sometime soon. Though my lacking of a car is a large problem aswell... Ahh well...

I hate writing so fragmented, I can never focus when I'm upset. The cool thing is, I know Mongolian BBQ want to hire me, just at the time when I applied they weren't offering enough, but now I need a job badly enough to take it, it's also a good place for me, I can cook and talk to people all day without having to catch orders. But there are other places around here that need people and I'm going to spend all day finding them if I have too and I'm taking Katy with me! So I guess for the few who care wish me luck and if you like E-mail me, I miss everyone a great deal and I'd love to hear from them... VANESSA! :-D

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(no subject) [Nov. 30th, 2004|01:40 am]
[mood |Fizzizled]
[music |Elevator mucis in my mind... :-)]

Mmm, how boring life has been, though today I put in a few apps and brought home many and tomorrow I'm gonna put in many more. You wouldn't beleave how many places aren't hiring at the mall, it's unreal! lol Other then that life has been pretty okay I guess, nothing special or anything like that. Katy and I are still doing well, ahh! Thats whats different! G-man, Katys ex has basicly gone totally psyco... He was calling her like 6 times a fuckin' day and always text messaging her and was sending her pictures of himself through his camara phone to her E-mail and one picture she really could have delt with out (though she E-mailed it to all her friends as they happly laughted at it!!! lol), anyways, everytime she'ed talk to him he'd say he loved her and shes say "you too", it was really fuckin' pissin' me off, ALOT, but she was basicly doin' it to shut his ass up, but because of it he got the idea that they were gonna get back together, because once I got pissed about all this and said something to her the next time he called her up she told him she doesn't want him calling all the time and no she doesn't want to be with him anymore (which shes said countless times) and now he's pissed, saying I stabbed him in the back, and that he fucking hates me and blah blah blah... They've now been broken up for over 5 months, we've been dating 2 months and sleeping together the whole time, you'ed think he'd be over her by now, I know I would. Speaking of that, Darcy has yet to E-mail me back in like forever, she E-mail me back once, I replyed and she has yet to say anything to me. I was thinking about talking to her or something but I dunno, shes not calling me or anything or even IMing me when shes online so I guess she doesn't want to talk to me. I miss Vanessa, I should give her a call, I hung out with her about 4 days ago but havn't talked to her since, I wounder how things are goin'... I miss the old days with her, mostly the first year I was dating Darcy, not because of Darcy but because of Vanessa, we hung out all the time, we were close, I loved her and she was even willing to openly say that she loved me back, but I guess those days are gone. As much as I like new Vanessa, I loved my old Vanessa, I guess I could really say my Vanessa... I guess things in life change and you can't always fix them, but you can always try. :-) It's weird though, if we havn't seen or talked to each other in awhile she gets really distant, but if we hang out for a long time or she each other a few days in a row she gets really really open and happy... Is this an effect around only me or is this normal? I dunno... Just miss the oldin' days... Oh, still havn't gotten skinner, damn it... Damn this cold weather stopping me from wanting to be outside. Oh well all, I'm tired and I've got ALOT to do tomorrow.


PS, damn it, hold on to the people you love as long as you know they want you to hold on.
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...Do I join?! [Nov. 3rd, 2004|07:49 pm]
[mood |determined]
[music |...Nothingness...]

Well yesterday G-man called up Katy well we were doin' some John Kerry work, it was interesting, he endded up talking to me and everything. It's weird, he's living my dream by being in the Army and I'm livin' his by being with Katy... But after talking to him it's really made me want to join, even if with that fucking assface Bush in office. Why should I not go through with my dream just because of this fucker?!?! So I went in and talked with an Officer today, I just need to lose like 10Ibs or so and get my GED, I scored pretty well on that test they give you but my math was way low, so I just need to study in math and get my GED, then I should be good to go. I don't know how Katy feels about this really, she seems to support me but I know she doesn't want me to go... I dunno, I'm really falling for her, she means alot to me and don't want to hurt her but this is my dream! Your not suppost to let anything get in the way of your dreams, right? Ahh well, so right now I'm loading up with like 100Ib of stuff in my backpack and running like 1-2 miles through white hill with all this stuff so I can get in shape, I'm workin' out at Katys house, they have a weight bench and a punching bag. So if nothing else I'll atleast get into shape and have my GED. :-) Other then that lifes been pretty boring, I'm fucking pissed Bush won, makes me hate this country, the only time we've been attacked on our own land int he past 50 years was under his watch!!! How can people feel safe with him in office, he has almost no clue of whats really going on around him, he's just this horrable leader (I hate using the word "leader" anywhere near his name)! Poor Iraq is a total war zone and I fear joining just simply because I don't want to die in a war that was a total fuck up! Ahh well... I'm off to go do my running now.


Does anyone own an M16a2, M4a1, Car-15, Ar-15 or any form of M16 model that lives in Michigan, I'd like to learn how to take apart and rebuild and fire an M16 before I join, just so I know.
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(no subject) [Oct. 29th, 2004|08:17 pm]
Hello all! It's me again! lol Well it looks like I have a temp job doin' door to door John Kerry stuff, not to bad, $50 a day! Also my buddy Paul it suppost to get me a job at his work doin' wearhouse work, starts at like $14 an hour! So hopefully I'll be all happy and normal again! If nothing else theres a pizza place about a mile from my house thats lookin' for ast. Managers and Katy knows the Manager and he seemed very interested in me... Well besides all that Katy and I are doing well, shes still gettin' on my nerves a little from seeing her so much but were cuttin' down on time together, trying to be a little more normal! lol I'm about to head out to her house and meet up with two of her friends (Jamie and Katy, Jamies this guy who has the Super 9 sniper rifle hes gonna let me use!) and were gonna go out airsofting! I can't wait to use that rifle, I wanted Mark to spot targets for me but he's not doin' tonight... Pitty... Katys not feelin' to well, earlier today she didn't think she was gonna go but now see says she feels up to it. I hope shes alright, I'd ask her to spot for me but she likes bein' on her own and such and I have a feeling she might not be up to that tonight. Yeah, Umm, tomorrow Katy and I are throwing a party at her friend Kathys house, I'm gonna call up as many friends as I can, though on such short notice I doubt that many people will show up... Ahh well, it should be fun... Well speaking of fun, I'm off to go test out most of my sniping skills.

Edward The Great! lol
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(no subject) [Oct. 26th, 2004|11:28 am]
[mood |uncomfortableuncomfortable]
[music |DVD menu of The Abyss]

What a pile of problems... Still jobless, this sucks ass... I've gotta get a job by the end of this week or I'm fucked. Havn't really talked to Darcy latly, shes doesn't call or even IM me anymore, looks like I just passed right through her life as if I wasn't even there... But Katy and I are doing well, every now and then we get on one anothers nerves, but thats about it. Whenever were not out looking for a job we either spend out time together or out playin' airsoft with friends, we played last night, that was awesome! I was in full camo with a tac vest and this cloak that Katy has which blends very well, I was using my spring powered M16 to sniper at close range with, though most the night I was counter sniping against a guy using the same tactics. He too was the only other person in full camo and using an M4 (a shorter cut down M16). But Mark and Katy didn't like the new park we were playin' at, to many houses and such near by, and there was only 8 people total last night and way to big of an area for 8 people. So yeah, I had fun last night! But it's hard playin' airsoft with Derick without wanting to ask about Darcy, I guess it's just hard for me to deal with her movin' on and fuckin' someone else, don't me wrong I'm doing the same as I'm sure it bothered her aswell. The other thing is I'm not sure if I want to be in a realationship right now, I kinda liked being single, I think theres just something about the freedom, I could careless about sleepin' around, it's just not having to worry about someone else. Things were actully a little easier on my own. I dunno, only time will tell, hopefully things will work out and I won't have these feelings, I just hope no one gets hurt in the long run... Well, I guess I'm off, got some house work today.

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(no subject) [Oct. 17th, 2004|07:26 pm]
[mood |uncomfortableuncomfortable]
[music |X-men in the back ground...]

For the first time in like a week I'm alone yet again... I enjoy my time with Katy but I think we spend to much time with each other. Yesterday was interesting, we went to her sisters house, then her sister wanted to go to this party and someone at the party offered me money for gas. Well that was fine then she invited her ex/bf with us, into my car and I don't like him at all... So I was stuck driving him we get there and it's a house party with nothing but punk bands playing (later on there was this okay band but with an awesome singer, he sounded like the guy from Bile), then the singer from Me-109 was there (O-dog) and he kept tryin' to kiss and grab Katy because he has this huge crush on her and was drunk as hell... Well besides all that the party went pretty well, then Sarah (Katys sister) didn't want to leave so I endded up having to take Steve (her ex/bf) home and he was drunk as fuck and a mean drunk at that... So that really pissed me off... I've been tryin' like hell to get a job, turned in lots and lots of apps and it looks like I might be able to work for Katys uncle for a little while until I can get a real job. He installs sprinkler systems, which is fine by me, I guess he pays really well too, moneys all that matters right now, I've got a car and debts to pay. Yeah, but I think the the next day or too I'm gonna worry about myself, hang out with some friends and clean my house! lol I need to get a grip... I just found out Darcy's seein' someone new a guy named Josh. She went to high school with him, then started seein' him like a week ago and then started dating him this past friday (like 3 days ago). Whats weird about it is she said she didn't want to date anyone and now shes datin' this guy, she said she changed her mind on it after like a month... Crazy woman, I guess I did the same thing, I didn't want to just fuck around with people, then I changed my mind and was like I don't want to date anyone, just sleep with them and now I'm in a realtionship. I kinda scared myself with it, I do wish I didn't just jump into it but hey, I'm happy! :-) Well I think I'm off, I got stuff I gotta go do.

Edward Calagari

PS Jessie, your right, I shouldn't forget about my friends and I'll be very sure not too.
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